Back in the city

Apologies for the delayed blog go to my few, but faithful, readers.

After coming back to London, I was on a high for about a week. Just thinking about that weekend in St Louis and how amazing it was to actually spend time with Andy kept me in a goofy-smiled stupor pretty much all the time. Most of the time, I'm annoyed that things get in the way of thinking about him. The problem is that most of those things are important, like work, for example. As I was already ready to leave the job, it's been tough sometimes when this is what gets in the way. But knowing that I'll be home in a short while has made it much easier to go about my day.

Then there's the time difference. When I'm at work, he's sleeping. When I'm off work, he's at work. When he's off work, I'm sleeping. Fridays and Saturdays are our major relief and possibly the only thing keeping us sane. Before St Louis, it was the anticipation of meeting for the first time that made the countdown frustrating. Now, however, I find myself unable to wait for the time when I'll be able to see him so frequently. The time when we can make a plan in two minutes on a whim and it can actually happen. It's a great thing that we're both looking forward to.

The countdown has officially begun: five weeks from today (almost to the hour) I will be landing at Sky Harbor and racing through the terminal to meet Andy, the man who made it happen. We were skyping when he bought the plane ticket, and I can't remember ever feeling that way before. He is such a caring, thoughtful and amazing guy, and I can't wait to spend more time with him. I'm sure that the words I just used to describe him are only a cursory glance.

I have to echo something he said in his last post: I've never been in love either. I remember thinking that I was in love in high school. Looking back now, I can't even remember why I thought that, considering that I barely knew who I was and what it meant to say something so serious. But now, I'm absolutely sure about this one. I know that my love for him will grow deeper the more time we spend together. Now I just have to be patient until that time comes.

I think that if I had stayed for another year, what is starting between the two of us could have been very different. Of course, the intentions would have been the same, but I feel like our relationship has reached a certain point where it can't progress until we spend time together, and experience things together. I'm feeling extremely happy that we know when that will happen, rather than wondering when I'll be able to get time off work and buy the plane ticket home, etc., and all that just for a short visit. This is much better, indeed.

But before that comes the hard part: we have decided not to skype for the remaining time that I'm in London. Essentially, I want to ensure that I make the most of the time I have left here with my friends, and that will generally include dragging them out to museums and other sites I haven't yet seen. It will be bitter-sweet.

I'm so thankful and grateful that God has made all this possible. I've always been blessed in my decisions (whether I realise it or not) but this one takes them all. My life's biggest prayer has been answered, and is better than I could ever have imagined. I'm eternally grateful and will never fully understand why I deserve such a great man.

I'm also reading the book 'Crazy Love'. Once I've finished, my next post will summarise what I've learned about myself.

Until then; over and out.